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.: Where Have All the Men Gone??? :.

Ok ladies; tell me if this hasn�t been a question that has been haunting you for ages. Guys, I�m sure this can apply to all of you as well. Have you ever noticed that when you are single and most definitely looking, it�s almost as if the members of the opposite sex are in extinction? They are absolutely nowhere to be found. Everywhere you turn there are couples and people getting married and its like you are the only single person in the world. Why the hell is that? Then, on the flip side of the problem, once you have been lucky enough to pull one out of the woodwork, they start cloning themselves. And if that isn�t bad enough, they all are upgraded to a better version than the one that you were able to snag.

Here�s a little story for ya...I was going through a dry spell there for a while where I thought that maybe everyone on the planet had gotten some secret memo that I had the plague or something. It was very damaging to my self-esteem. Going out, not getting one guys glance in my direction, not even the perverted 80 year old, �I haven�t been laid since the depression�, ones. I never thought that I was a hideously grotesque creature, but what else could be the explanation for not turning one head? I worried my self-sick. I started to think something was seriously wrong with me. Was I that ugly? Did I smell? Was I a dork? What was it? Why couldn�t I interest any guy to take me out? Everywhere I turned there were people making out, talking in that lovey, wuvy voice, holding hands, giggling at each other. Blahhh! Make me puke why don�t ya. It made no sense. When I had a boyfriend, it seemed like there were possible suitors around every corner, but once I was single...

Ah, ha! Then it hits me. Obviously, we must omit some type of hormone when we are single that we don�t produce when we are coupled. I mean honestly, do you have a better explanation? It makes sense. When we are single, we are more vulnerable and desperate, you may say. I think this must trigger something in one of our many glands that produce some type of stinky stuff that only the opposite sex can sense. They are apparently aware of this strange odor, and therefore are turned off by you. When you are with someone, for some reason this same gland is not as active. Or maybe it is, but the person you are with just doesn�t get affected. Hmmmm... That could explain how we are compatible with some types but not others. Anyway, back onto the subject. When this hormone scent thing is not present, you become much more desirable to the opposite sex. Well, that�s my theory anyway.

It�s just amazing to me, that now that I am engaged, men are everywhere. And cute ones at that. Don�t get me wrong. I am completely 110% in love with my fianc�' and faithful, but where were all these guys before? And why all of a sudden are they all interested? Just this week, I already have been asked out on two dates. Two dates! And they know I am engaged. Is that why I am so desirable now? Is it more of a game than a hormonal stench?

If you think back to prehistoric days, it has always been the thrill of the chase that attracts one being to another, be it animal or man. Cave men use to bonk their potential honeys in the head with a stick and pull them back to their cave for a good time. Hello? Obviously they had to chase these poor women first, I know I�d be running if someone was trying to beat me in the head with a stick or dinosaur femur. And for some strange reason this made her more desirable.

Is that why we go after people who are already taken? Is it the thrill of the chase? Do we subconsciously just want to prove to ourselves that we have that kind of power over people? I know from a personal standpoint that I am, when I was allowed to be, attracted to single, married, dating, whatever the marital status may be, guys. It�s the person for me really, not the status. If anything, it�s more of a turnoff once you find out that they are involved. Who wants to really get into all that mess? Oh, well I guess I kind of did, but that�s different.

I guess it is just the nature of the beast and it is a question that will remain unanswered (although, I do like my theory on the stink thing). I guess we just need to accept the fact that as long as we are in a relationship, we will be constantly oogled over and desired by many. Hey, I guess that�s not all too bad...

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.: 9:13 p.m. :.
.: January 24, 2004 :.

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.: yin :: yang :.