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.: Ladies, put your men away. I'm on the prowl..... :.

So, let me tell you about my lovely afternoon. As if I weren't pissed off enough at that fact that I had to go to work today in the 10feet of snow, I now have been abruptly thrown back into the "he said she said" of 9th grade.

As I was attempting to leave work today, I was confronted by one of the guys I work with. He went on to tell me how his girlfriend really dispised me and that she didn't want him to even speak to me. Let me fill you in here a little. See, I have been working with this guy for over a year now and he basicly is just a co-worker. We don't hang out after work, we never talk on the phone, we hardly communicate except for work related subjects. Yeah, he's a cool kid, but not someone I am planning on stealing anytime soon.

Well, she has it in her head that I am after him, all thanks to a girl I use to work with in the 9th grade. Yes, you heard me right. The 9th grade. And it has been probably a good 8 years since I have seen her. I use to be friends with her husband, much before the time they even knew each other. Once they started dating, none of us hung out anymore. Long story short, she was jealous that we were friends, talked shit on me, and we never spoke again. 8 years later, she pops back up and happens to be related to this guy i work withs fiance'. Are you still with me??? So, his fiance' was told, by this girl from 9th grade, "If I were you I wouldn't let your boyfriend hang around her because she is a slut and she will just try to steal him from you." Hello? How old are we? Anyway, at this comment, his fiance' forbids him to ever speak to me in fear that I will snatch him up and lock him away for my own kinky enjoyment. I love when people I don't know, know me so well. Now that you are filled in on the history of the problem, I can move on to todays mishap.

So this guy confronts me today and is pissed off that I have been "talking shit" about the illusive "affair" we have been hiding for so long. And I am really hindering his crazy, untrusting, why the hell are you two together, relationship. Again, hello???? Since when have we started to hang out and have I had this crazy plan to steal you. Last time I checked I was engaged and pretty much in love with one guy that well, isn't you...

I don't mean to ramble, but I am just really annoyed. I live in a small state. News travels. I really don't want all these people that I don't know thinking "Hey, there's that girl we heard about." It's hard for me to ignore when I get thrown in the middle of it unwillingly.

It is really starting to make me wonder if people see something in me that I can't. Am I acting in an ill manner? Is what I have always thought of me being outgoing and friendly, being misconstrued into some sort of evil, devious scam I'm trying to pull?

I am just really irritated. Why do I care, honestly. And my "friend" says to me, "Well, if it isn't true, why are you letting it bother you so much." Man that pissed me off. It bothers me because I suffer from that disease where I have to be liked by everyone. I can't stand it if people talk about me or think bad things about me. I pride myself on the fact that I am (for the most part) a genuine, good person. Ughh, now i'm mad that i am getting a complex over this.

To top it all off, this guy i work with askes me afterwards why me and my ex broke up. Its still a touchy subject and one that I don't like to think about so my eyes got a little teary. I asked why and he told me that he had heard a story on what happened from this crazy girl from 9th grade. #1, she never knew my ex. #2, I never lived in this state with my ex #3. What the hell business is it of hers to bring up my failed marriage??? I told him the real reason why it ended, and he felt bad for asking in the first place since it brought me to tears. I hate crying in front of people.

This is a pattern in my life. I'm not sure why though. I really don't think my life is all that glamorous, but according to the people I know, and don't know for that matter, I should have my own fucking sitcom. Apparently my life is pretty damn exciting and interesting. Well it would have to be to have this many people be involved.

There is so much I want to write, but I don't want to bore you all anymore. I need to do something to vent.

Peace out.

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.: 6:34 p.m. :.
.: January 28, 2004 :.

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.: yin :: yang :.